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Tweeted twitter.com/#!/StackEnglishLL/status/561352313797763073
Added spaces and capitalisation. Also corrected punctuation.
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edit approved Jan 25, 2015 at 20:50
Greenonline
edit approved Jan 25, 2015 at 20:50
Greenonline
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I moved to the UK  (Scotland), as non native englishEnglish speaker. Since then I discovered, for example, that thenwhen somebody offers you something, and you don’t want thisit, you can’t just simply say “no”“No” (as in my native language), to. To not sound rude/passive aggressive you need to say “no“No, thank you”. Similar

Similar problem, I was asked in free time by person in charge of me  (manager) and who is two times older “can“Can I have a lighter, please”, if. If I translate this question to my native language, “please” word in in this case seems very submissive and asis a big no-no in this exact question. Same

Same thing with ability to being able to speak “per you”/without adding title/small talk with older people or saying hi/hello, instead of more formal forms while greeting strangers.

Asking this kind of question in real world make me look like some ghetto man/barbarian, natives at first often don’t realize that some things are just different in different cultures.

The question is, can I learn about englishEnglish language related manners not the hard way? How to not sound rude/passive aggressive without being too official?

I moved to UK(Scotland), as non native english speaker. Since then I discovered for example, that then somebody offers you something, and you don’t want this, you can’t just simply say “no”(as in my native language), to not sound rude/passive aggressive you need to say “no, thank you”. Similar problem, I was asked in free time by person in charge of me(manager) and who is two times older “can I have a lighter, please”, if I translate this question to my native language, “please” word in this case seems very submissive and as big no-no in this exact question. Same thing with ability to being able to speak “per you”/without adding title/small talk with older people or saying hi/hello, instead of more formal forms while greeting strangers.

Asking this kind of question in real world make me look like some ghetto man/barbarian, natives at first often don’t realize that some things are just different in different cultures.

The question is, can I learn about english language related manners not the hard way? How to not sound rude/passive aggressive without being too official?

I moved to the UK  (Scotland), as non native English speaker. Since then I discovered, for example, that when somebody offers you something, and you don’t want it, you can’t just simply say “No” (as in my native language). To not sound rude/passive aggressive you need to say “No, thank you”.

Similar problem, I was asked in free time by person in charge of me  (manager) and who is two times older “Can I have a lighter, please”. If I translate this question to my native language, “please” in this case seems very submissive and is a big no-no in this exact question.

Same thing with ability to being able to speak “per you”/without adding title/small talk with older people or saying hi/hello, instead of more formal forms while greeting strangers.

Asking this kind of question in real world make me look like some ghetto man/barbarian, natives at first often don’t realize that some things are just different in different cultures.

The question is, can I learn about English language related manners not the hard way? How to not sound rude/passive aggressive without being too official?

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ColleenV
ColleenV
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October
October
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Manners in UK - language problem

I moved to UK(Scotland), as non native english speaker. Since then I discovered for example, that then somebody offers you something, and you don’t want this, you can’t just simply say “no”(as in my native language), to not sound rude/passive aggressive you need to say “no, thank you”. Similar problem, I was asked in free time by person in charge of me(manager) and who is two times older “can I have a lighter, please”, if I translate this question to my native language, “please” word in this case seems very submissive and as big no-no in this exact question. Same thing with ability to being able to speak “per you”/without adding title/small talk with older people or saying hi/hello, instead of more formal forms while greeting strangers.

Asking this kind of question in real world make me look like some ghetto man/barbarian, natives at first often don’t realize that some things are just different in different cultures.

The question is, can I learn about english language related manners not the hard way? How to not sound rude/passive aggressive without being too official?