One day, Sonny sees a bruise on Connie's face and she tells him that Carlo hit her after she asked him if he was having an affair.
if "he" means Sonny, why she diverting topic here ?
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It is grammatically ambiguous which person he refers to.
Consider the following sentences, where Tom and Harry are male, and Sally is female:
In the first two, it's clear who he refers to because there aren't any other male names in each sentence. However, note that he can refer to either the person who called, or the person who was called. This makes the third sentence ambiguous, since he (and him) can refer to either Tom or Harry.
When grammar fails to disambiguate, sometimes the context can help. Consider the following example, where I have placed X, Y and Z in brackets to make it easy to refer to specific instances of he later.
Here, the context makes clear who the 3 instances of he refer to. The phrase "he declined" meant that Z didn't want Z's car to be driven. Since Tom doesn't have a car, Z=Harry. Since Harry answered, Tom must have asked, so X=Tom. And since it wouldn't make sense for Tom to ask if Harry could drive his own car - and even less for Harry to decline, Y=Tom.
Let's return to your example. "He" could refer grammatically to Sonny or Carlo. We can establish this by pretending the other name is female, and checking whether the sentence still makes sense grammatically - it does.
Now we look at the context. Let's call the 3 pronouns (him, him, he) P, Q and R, in the order they appear in your sentence. Grammatically, it's clear that P=Sonny. There are 4 possibilities remaining for Q and R. Here are some potential scenarios in each case, together with an excuse that Carlo might offer for his aggression.
Many would say that #4 is the most plausible reconstruction, but the fact that the others cannot be immediately dismissed means that in this case, there is insufficient context within the sentence to disambiguate. More context would be needed.
As for why Connie changed the subject in the case of #1 or #3, the sentence you provided doesn't tell us.