When you are consoling somebody about their loss knowing they may dislike it

Question

Imagine you are talking to a friend about their recent loss and you know that they may dislike to hear condolence (at least at that specific moment). In such a situation in my mother language, there is such a possibility to say:

• I don't mean to console you, but...

Or

• My words are not consolations, but...

Which one of the above-mentioned self-made structures sounds natural in English to begin a friendly conversation to show your emotions and bad feelings regarding the happening that your friend is facing at the moment and make them feel better?

Answer 1

My answer is the same as your other question:

"I'm very sorry for your loss."

When someone is experiencing grief, they often don't want elaborate consolation or excessive emotion. This simple sentiment is often used as a way to show consideration without intruding too much into their personal pain.

If they respond positively to this, and you would like to say more, then there are other simple phrases you can say, such as, "There are no words, but I want you to know I'm here for you," and, "Please let me know if I can help out in any way."

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