There is a belief that some men value a woman just because of her womanity, not because of a respect toward a so called 'holy' and honorable creature. Please imagine you as a man respect all women because you respect this gender not because of their sex, but because this gender is considered as valuable and precious one for you as a man. Suppose you are in a train give your seat to a young lady and when you stay up, your friend says humorously (but with a bad intonation):

  • Hey man, did you like her? [smilingly]

You want to tell him that what you did was only out of respect and nothing more. There is a way in my mother language to indicate such a message. I need to make sure if it works in English too.

[Direct translation]: Steve, I don't look at all women like a hole. (meaning that I didn't have any sexual intent]

[No matter how old are they, such a sentence can be used between friends.]

If it sounds a bit off or wired, then I would appreciate if you could let me know what a native would say to indicate the same thing.

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    The idiomatic term in English is sex object. You do not look at women as sex objects.
    – TimR
    Commented Jan 22, 2017 at 11:41
  • 1
    Regardless of the correct translation: Discussing wether or not you are sexually attracted to a woman, in her presence, is extremely rude in most English-speaking cultures, and should not be done at all. A proper reaction would be to tell your friend to shut up, and maybe apologize to the woman.
    – averell
    Commented Feb 18, 2019 at 17:42

4 Answers 4


You would say to your friend

chivalry is not dead - 2. courteous behaviour, esp. towards women

These acts may include
- opening a door
- walking on the street side
- giving up your seat

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    Or even "I'm just being polite"; the term "chivalry" is sometimes considered sexist. (The discussion about why and whether it should be is likely off-topic here, but might be a good fit for the Politics or Interpersonal SE sites.)
    – brichins
    Commented Mar 12, 2018 at 18:34
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    @brichins You are correct, "chivalry" can only be applied to males, just as "knights" can only be male. For those waiting to pounce, Joan d'Arc was not a knight but did wear armour, cross dressing at its finest.
    – Peter
    Commented Mar 12, 2018 at 23:52

I think, a term used in English in a similar fashion to the one in your language could possibly be to objectify someone. What this term means is that you tend to see women as objects of sexual desire and nothing more. A lot of feminists find this degrading and demeaning.


Steve, don't you dare to objectify women! They're not sex toys for men!


Given your comment that you "respect all women because you respect this gender not because of their sex, but because this gender is considered as valuable and precious one for you", then it sounds like you are implying that you are a feminist or that you believe and subscribe to feminism.

However, you also then mentioned a phrase that means "I didn't have any sexual intent". If that was the specific point you wanted to make, you could reply to Steve that your response to give her the seat was platonic.

So a complete reply might be: "Steve, I'm a feminist, and giving my seat to her was a purely platonic gesture."

  • I would really like an explanation for the down-vote. Exactly how is this answer not useful? I am wondering if who ever did that understands the actual meaning of feminist and platonic. Commented Sep 24, 2017 at 3:03
  • Not downvoter, but the term "feminist" is quite politically charged and thus brings way more baggage into this situation than the other answers. Similarly, "platonic" is somewhat obscure and archaic (though accurate); putting them both into the same sentence makes this answer a poor choice, particularly for a beginning English speaker. "Steve" would be very unlikely to understand the OP's intended meaning from this phrase.
    – brichins
    Commented Mar 12, 2018 at 18:31
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    @JohnnyGar This answer is reasonably accurate and useful, and likely to lead to further learning for the OP. Unfortunately for women, people here have internalized the idea that the human rights of women are somehow controversial, which is evident in their verbosity in objecting to "bringing baggage" into hypothetical situations out of concern for the well-being of hypothetical participants, as well as the notably selective objection to learning, are puzzling indeed. There are 171,476 English words; one wonders why the term "feminist" is singled out for discouragement, while "platonic" passes. Commented Mar 13, 2018 at 8:32
  • @brichins Thanks very much for your comment. While I don't agree at all that "feminist" is politically charged, nor that "platonic" is obscure or archaic, I very much appreciate you sharing your view as it helps me understand the down vote. Unfortunately, it also seems to confirm my intuition regarding a lack of understanding of these two words and how very common their use actually is. Commented Mar 13, 2018 at 22:13
  • @OpenSorceress Thanks also for your comment; very considerate of you to add a balancing perspective. Nice nickname, by the by (and I say that as a purely platonic gesture). ;^) Commented Mar 13, 2018 at 22:18

In English, referring to a woman as a "hole" would be considered extremely rude and crude. Even the negation of this, "I DON'T see all women as holes", would be considered rather crude.

Perhaps what you want to say is, "I don't see all women as sex objects", though that would be a rather extreme statement under the circumstances. More likely you'd say something like, "I'm just being polite. There was no sexual or romantic intent."

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