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I wonder if there are countable nouns that can be used to describe the same meaning with crap/garbage. Preferably in oral English?

This TV series is a/an _______, I don't want to watch it!

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  • 2
    Use a counter to get a countable noun: a piece of crap, a pile of garbage, etc.
    – Robusto
    May 4, 2017 at 0:46
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    A countable equivalent of crap is turd. Be careful though because it is quite vulgar. Crap is vulgar too, but not as much.
    – Dangph
    May 4, 2017 at 7:24

3 Answers 3

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If you are strictly looking for countable (or singular) nouns, some similar words are joke, farce, flop, and drag.

  • joke noun (RIDICULOUS)
    ​[ U ] infml something considered to be so bad or worthless that it is ridiculous:
    The playing conditions on the muddy field were a joke.
    The midterm exam was a joke (= too easy).
  • farce noun (SITUATION)
    [ C ] a ridiculous situation or event, or something considered a waste of time:
    The meeting turned out to be a farce since no one had prepared anything.
  • drag noun (BORING EVENT)
    [ U ] infml someone or something that is unpleasant and boring:
    Waiting in a doctor’s office is such a drag!
  • flop noun (FAILURE)
    [ C usually sing ] infml a failure:
    The movie was a complete flop.

(Cambridge Dictionary)

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You can always quantify noncountable nouns using a counter word.

Example #1:

This TV series is a bunch of crap. I don't want to watch it!

Example #2:

This TV series is a crock of shit. I don't want to watch it!

And that's basically how it's typically done in English. There are literally dozens of counter words to choose from: a pile of crap, a piece of shit et cetera. Take your pick.

As for countable words, it's very difficult to fill in that black, to be perfectly honest. If you really do want to use a different construction there, then you need to get familiar with idioms expressing the idea of something being of inferior quality. One possible idiom that comes to my mind that would possibly work in your particular context would probably be the pits:

This TV series is the pits. I don't want to watch it!

Though, there are still a lot of simpler ways to say it:

This TV series sucks, man. I don't want to watch it!

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  • I really appreciate this answer, but isn't there a real countable noun to replace "crap"?
    – No One
    May 4, 2017 at 0:51
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Despite there being a number of different words for garbage, like rubbish, trash and so on there are very few countable noun versions. As Cookie Monster has already mentioned, you can use collective nouns to quantify those nouns.

With regards to your specific example, a word like dud, bomb or bust could be used. While its definition is slightly different, it's often used in a similar context.

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