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Significance of immune responses in disease A with diabetic patients.

Is this sentence grammatically correct? The meaning I want to convey is that this study is on the effects of immune responses on disease A in patients with diabetes (i.e. the patients have diabetes and disease A, but the effects of immune responses are applicable only to disease A.)

If this does not work, does either of the following options convey the above meaning?

1) Significance of immune responses in disease A, with diabetic patients.

2) Significance of immune responses in disease A in diabetic patients.

The double usage of the word 'in' in the second option makes me hesitate to use it. I realize that I could reword the sentence, but this was written by someone else and I don't want to make too many drastic changes. Can someone help me?

Thanks in advance.

  • "...due to disease A in diabetic patients." – mkennedy May 17 '17 at 23:53
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This study discusses the efficacy of the immune response to disease A in diabetics. (How I might write it.)

This study is on the effects of the immune response to disease A in patients with diabetes. (How you might write it changing little.)

In answer to the two choices above, choice 2 is best. "This study is about the effects..." or "looks at the effect" would be acceptable. The singular "immune response to" (but "immune responses in patients with") is acceptable, unless there are clearly multiple forms of immune responses that may be delineated. We use "to" as a directional preposition for an immune response, which is to an antigen.

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