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Can one write

a. The attacks when I was at the hospital were mild.

b. The attacks during my stay at the hospital were mild.

?

In these sentences 'when I was at the hospital' and 'during my stay at the hospital' are supposed to be time clauses that postmodify 'the attacks' restrictively. They are supposed to be adjectival.

The sentences are supposed to mean:

The attacks that occurred when I was at the hospital/during my stay at the hospital were mild.

Maybe there were other attacks that occurred elsewhere and were not mild.

Would you say the sentences work with that meaning?

Many thanks

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  • Both of these sentences are perfectly clear. when I was is what you would probably say, and during my stay is clearer and slightly more formal: you would probably write this.
    – JavaLatte
    Commented Feb 12, 2018 at 11:45

1 Answer 1

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You can use those sentences. They are grammatically correct.

In terms of style, some people don't like to separate the subject of a sentence from the verb by too many words. If there are too many words, then by the time we get to "were mild" we have forgotten what we were talking about! (There is no hard rule on how many words is too many, use your judgement) It would be possible to rephrase:

(When/while) I was at the hospital, the attacks were mild.

or more radically

The attacks were mild until I'd left the hospital.

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