-1

Recently I read the text below in which the subject is suddenly changed(from Shawn to Father) so I 've lost the trace of meaning.

Could you please tell me the way that the subject is changed?

Could you explain the hole meaning of this paragraph?

Could you please tell me to which word refer "it" (in "I think it was my father")? to "creature"?

That person was Shawn, and I was looking at him but I wasn’t seeing him. I don’t know what I saw—what creature I conjured from that violent, compassionate act—but I think it was my father, or perhaps my father as I wished he were, some longed-for defender, some fanciful champion, one who wouldn’t fling me into a storm, and who, if I was hurt, would make me whole.

The fuller text is here:

My own memory of Shawn begins in the kitchen, perhaps two months after the second accident. I am making corn chowder. The door squeaks and I twist at the waist to see who’s come in, then twist back to chop an onion. “You gonna be a walking Popsicle stick forever?” Shawn says. “Nope.” “You need a chiropractor,” he says. “Mom’ll fix it.” “You need a chiropractor,” he says again. The family eats, then disperses. I start the dishes. My hands are in the hot, soapy water when I hear a step behind me and feel thick, callused hands wrap around my skull. Before I can react, he jerks my head with a swift, savage motion. CRACK! It’s so loud, I’m sure my head has come off and he’s holding it. My body folds, I collapse. Everything is black but somehow spinning. When I open my eyes moments later, his hands are under my arms and he’s holding me upright. “Might be a while before you can stand,” he says. “But when you can, I need to do the other side.” I was too dizzy, too nauseous, for the effect to be immediate. But throughout the evening I observed small changes. I could look at the ceiling. I could cock my head to tease Richard. Seated on the couch, I could turn to smile at the person next to me. That person was Shawn, and I was looking at him but I wasn’t seeing him. I don’t know what I saw—what creature I conjured from that violent, compassionate act—but I think it was my father, or perhaps my father as I wished he were, some longed-for defender, some fanciful champion, one who wouldn’t fling me into a storm, and who, if I was hurt, would make me whole.

  • 1
    The hole meaning?? :) To lose track of meaning, not trace. I don't know why the brother says she needs a chiropractor, but, notice, she doesn't turn her neck to look at him. She turns "from the waist". Her neck was hurting her already. He cracked her back for her, and that is what chiropractors typically do. A chiropractic cracking of the back/head can be very painful but also provide a lot of relief. I hope this helps. – Lambie May 11 '18 at 21:14
2

It is an allegory, or a fantasy, or actually happened.

The writer looked at Shawn, but saw his father.

Not exactly his father, but a version of his father he hoped would exist.

This is what his mind conjured from the violent therapy on his neck, which released a stream of chaotic thought.

There is a similar effect in meditation, where relaxing the grip of the mind can release a stream of ideas, some of which are not always welcome. It can be difficult to get past this stage.

  • @ Weather Vane Could you tell me what the meaning of "I don’t know what I saw—what creature I conjured from that violent, compassionate act" is? – Peace May 11 '18 at 19:24
  • 1
    I added something to my answer. – Weather Vane May 11 '18 at 19:25

Your Answer

By clicking “Post Your Answer”, you agree to our terms of service, privacy policy and cookie policy

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.