You are wasting your time trying to persuade her.
Can I replace ‘wasting’ by ‘spending’?
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The words have very different meanings.
"Wasting" implies that you will never persuade her. Your time is being "thrown away". It says that what you are doing is pointless.
"Spending" is more neutral. It means that you are using your time for some purpose. It suggests that you will achieve something.
Compare this with "wasting money" and "spending money".
Grammatically, both sentences are correct, but the meanings are very different.