The rule is to let ten minutes pass before ringing the doorbell again. This/That way we don't come up as persistent.
Should "this" or "that" be used in this case? And why?
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If the person speaking/narrating or "we" is currently enforcing/using this rule, or currently waiting to ring the doorbell again, "this" would be better as it's more present. In other contexts, "that" would be more appropriate. You could use "that" in either context, but you shouldn't use "this" if the person isn't currently using the rule.