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How to use reduce or enhance the following sentences?

  1. You shouldn't take that drug and you shouldn't see it as a cure.

  2. Apple who has a lion share of smartphone market is now forcing customer to pay for software upgrade.

My attemps :

  1. You shouldn't take that drug,seeing it as cure.

  2. Apple having a lion share of smartphone market is now .....

The first one doesn't sound right but the second one seems ok, I think.

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  • One note: you should use "which," not "who," after "Apple," since Apple is a company rather than a person.
    – alphabet
    Commented Feb 11, 2023 at 18:18
  • 2 With its lion share of the market, Apple [etc].
    – Lambie
    Commented Feb 11, 2023 at 18:52
  • The original sentence (2) is ungrammatical. Both of your attempts are also ungrammatical. Don't bother about "enhancing" or "reducing" sentences until you have enough grammatical sentences. Commented Feb 11, 2023 at 21:21

1 Answer 1

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As you said the first sentence is not accurate, it can be written as follows:

You shouldn't take that drug as a cure.

The second sentence: We use who to introduce someone, for example,

The man who is standing at the door is my father.

This can be reduced to "the man standing at the door is my father".

For your sentence, it is better to say

Apple since has a lion share of the smartphone market, now forces customers to pay for software upgrades.

Having a lion share of the smartphone market, Apple now forces customers to pay for software upgrades.

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