Can the possessive ever be omitted with these gerunds?

Question

Can one use

a. She agreed with me about going there.

instead of

a1. She agreed with me about her going there.

or

a2. She agreed with me about my going there.

?

======================

Can one use

b. She shared my thoughts about being in an office.

instead of

b1. She shared my thoughts about her being in an office.

or

b2. She agreed with me about my being in an office.

?

I always use the possessive adjective. But I am not sure if there are situations where it is clear that (a) and (b) simply cannot have multiple meanings and, as a result, can safely be used instead of the other sentences (e.g. if context made things clear). In other words, I wonder if in certain contexts the possessive adjectives might not be redundant.

Answer 1

In both examples, I agree with you and would always tend to use the possessive. The reason is because each of the non-possessive forms -- i.e. (a) and (b) -- are ambiguous. Indeed, your own question demonstrates that very ambiguity by showing that in each case it may actually be intended to convey one of at least two meanings -- i.e. either the "her" form, or the "my" form.

Now, I suppose there could be a surrounding context that would make it clear which of the "her" or "my" forms is intended, thereby making use of the possessive redundant, in theory at least. But even there, I doubt the context would make the possessive redundant in practice. In other words, even if context made it such that the possessive was not strictly necessary, I suspect that in most cases it would still be advisable to use it anyway, to ensure the ambiguity was resolved.

Of course, given the above, there is one example in which you might want to omit the ambiguity-resolving pronoun -- namely, where you actually want the ambiguity.

But in general, for clarity's sake, I'd always include the possessive.