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I am trying to state a comparative argument in a long sentence for an academic paper. I don't want to split it. Is there any way for shortening it? Is it always necessary to use "those of the" "that of the" in these kinds of comparative sentences?

Sentence:

"The Tarim Basin presents transitional values between those of the Tibet and the Yangtze, reflecting either a transitional state of its crust between those of the Tibet and Yangtze or the coexistence of these two states"

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    You are comparing the Tibet and the Yangtze? Are you speaking of rivers, basins, or something else? Is the Tibet a river? I think you can probably drop those of the but I'm not entirely sure what is being said.
    – EllieK
    Commented Feb 11, 2022 at 13:10
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    You seem to be using "values" and "states" as synonyms, and it isn't clear what you are talking about. Commented Feb 11, 2022 at 13:27
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    @EllieK I am comparing the Tarim (Transitional values) with the Tibet (high values) and Yangtze (low values) Basins, and am saying that these observations infer that the crust state of the Tarim Basin should be a transient state between the other two (Yangtze and Tibet). In other words, I am trying to infer the crust state from the values of those three regions.
    – Esi
    Commented Feb 11, 2022 at 16:26
  • @JackO'Flaherty They are two different things. I am trying to infer the crust states from the values of those three regions.
    – Esi
    Commented Feb 11, 2022 at 16:29
  • @Esi What do you mean by values? Commented Feb 11, 2022 at 18:48

1 Answer 1

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This seems to be a question of simplification and “de-cluttering” rather than one of phrasing. You simply need to omit a great many words. My suggestion:

The Tarim Basin presents values between those of the Tibet and Yangtze, reflecting either its crust’s transitional state (between those of the Tibet and Yangtze) or the coexistence of these two states.

For clarity, you need to specify what “these two states” refers to; otherwise, there isn’t really a way to avoid using the phrase “those of.” What you can do, however, is simplify everything else around it to make the flow of ideas more concise.

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