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A: My ex-wife has a boyfriend.

B: How long has she known him? / How long has she been seeing him?

What would be the most likely question in this context? One of my suggestions?

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  • 1
    What meaning do you want to convey as they are different?
    – mdewey
    Feb 28, 2022 at 16:04
  • How long they have been a couple. Feb 28, 2022 at 16:05
  • She might have known him as a friend/acquaintance while still married, and then started a romance after the divorce. Feb 28, 2022 at 16:30
  • This may just be AmE but the best and most common way would be How long have they been together? This directly implies their relationship status as intended.
    – Eli Harold
    Feb 28, 2022 at 18:56

2 Answers 2

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Neither of them is unambiguous about their being a couple.

How long has she known him?

This could date back well into the past before they became a couple. They might have been at infant school together for instance.

How long has she been seeing him?

This is closer but they could be seeing one another, dating in fact, for some time before they became a couple officially. People sometimes do not make the relationship public until they are sure, for some meaning of sure.

The least ambiguous way to phrase it is

How long have they been an item?
How long have they been a couple?
How long have they been together?

The last one was suggested in comments be Eli Harold and is also current in BrE.

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  • 2
    This may just be AmE but the best and most common way would be How long have they been together? This directly implies their relationship status as intended.
    – Eli Harold
    Feb 28, 2022 at 18:55
  • 1
    Yes and no. Yes about 'known', but no about 'seeing'. If they're dating, they're a couple. What is an 'official couple'?
    – mcalex
    Mar 1, 2022 at 2:50
  • 'Seeing' here is a euphemism for something else, in which the eyes are not the main organs involved. Also, 'dating' may be a rather prim way of expressing the likely situation, unless the participants are 1950s teenagers. Mar 1, 2022 at 10:39
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Both are fine.

𝗛𝗼𝘄 𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗴 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗯𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝘀𝗲𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗲𝗮𝗰𝗵 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿?(see= meet) or

How long has she known him? or

How long have they been a couple?

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