5

The following sentence will go into a technical article and I wanted to know how to write the following sentence in a better form:

Results are shown when the region localization constraint is enforced and when it is taken off.

I believe this does not read well. There are two "when"s and they spoil the sentence.

  • 1
    Change and to as well as? "Results are shown when the region localization constraint is enforced as well as when it is taken off." – snailcar Mar 2 '13 at 4:12
  • "Results are shown when the region localization constraint is (a) enforced or (b) {removed / discontinued [CHOOSE ONE]}." Using two "_when_s" doesn't really spoil the sentence, IMHO. It makes it clear. I'd leave them both there. Sometimes deleting too much causes ambiguity and forces awkwardness. – user264 Mar 2 '13 at 4:24
  • 1
    Results are shown with and without [enforcement of] the region localization constraint. – FumbleFingers Mar 2 '13 at 4:26
6

Results are shown when the region localization constraint is enforced and when it is taken off.

Without more context the meaning isn't clear; I'd rephrase it in one of the following ways, depending in part on intent.

Results are displayed first when the region localization constraint is enforced, and again when the constraint is taken off.
Results are shown for two cases: with and without region localization constraints enforced.

3

Results are shown with and without [enforcement of] the region localization constraint.

0

I might rewrite it like this:

Results are shown when the regional localization constraint is enforced or taken off.

I could probably be able to write a better sentence with more context.

Your Answer

By clicking “Post Your Answer”, you agree to our terms of service, privacy policy and cookie policy

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.