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I saw this joke just now and have googled for a while to understand what that means but failed.

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I can't believe someone broke into my house and stole all of my fruit. I am peachless.

I think the first sentence means that 'They are now fruitless' or 'They are now unproductive', but I cannot comprehend the second sentence.

Here are some of my guesses according to this thread and this article:

  1. it should be speechless
  2. no peach to eat

What does the 'peachless' mean? Thanks in advance.

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    It’s speechless. Commented Sep 11, 2023 at 0:01

2 Answers 2

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The expected phrase is "I'm speechless", as in, I'm completely lost for words.

The joke replaces the normal word with the made-up word "peachless", which is interpreted as "a state of where someone is without peaches".

This joke is a pun (wordplay) and also an absurd humor.

A pun is where the expected word is changed to another word, (sometimes made-up, but can be a real word), to convey a different meaning than expected.

The absurd scenario is regarding the robbery. In this scenario, if someone broke into your home, you tend to not worry about whether you have any peaches left. The joke is in the sudden shift from "being concerned with a robbery" to "being concerned about lack of peaches", which is absurd.

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    The other issue is that the joke is presented as a "Dad Joke". That is a type of joke that is not expected to be very funny, relying on bad puns or ethnic-based or other low-brow humor. The term "Dad Joke" relates to a situation in which a teenage child is embarrassed by the poor quality of jokes told by their father in public.
    – user177197
    Commented Sep 11, 2023 at 1:08
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    Yes, a jokester dad will start with a punchline in his head and then concoct an often very implausible scenario where the punchline can be used. If all the jars of baby food peaches had been stolen, and the baby was telling the joke, we could call it "strained" humor. Commented Sep 11, 2023 at 10:23
  • Pear-fect answer.
    – Astralbee
    Commented Jan 28 at 13:03
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@Nelson's answer is correct except they underestimated an important element.

In the story, someone broke in and stole all of the fruit. Because there is no fruit in the shop (or home); it is literally without peaches i.e. peach less.

When written as one word, "peachless”, we immediately see it's also a pun on the word speechless.

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