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Here are two sentences that I want to know I can both use no matter what situation I'm in.

By the time a memorable incident happened, I had been working just for a few weeks.

By the time I had been working just for a few weeks, a memorable incident happened.

I'd like to know if the two sentences are the same. And can I use 'when' in the same way as 'by the time' here?

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I don't think either of your sentences sound very natural, unfortunately. However, the first works a little better in terms of order.

"By the time" means "sometime before the moment in question", so we need a concluded/finished action directly after this phrase: "a memorable incident happened". We have to continue to provide our main information: "I had been working for just a few weeks".

As I said, I don't think either of your sentences sound particularly natural, and in answer to the second part of your question, I think the following would sound best:

When the memorable incident happened, I had been working for just a few weeks.

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