0

Suppose two people are playing an indoor game (billiards) and there's a television installed nearby where the normal TV channels are being aired. While the two players are deeply engaged in the game, an advertisement (a risque one such as a condom or some such product) comes up where some hot chicks are shown and one person's attention gets diverted towards the TV instead of playing the game. The other person says

Attention!! We have a game to finish

But this sounds really weird. How do I draw back his/her attention back in a preferably humorous, colloquial and mocking way?

closed as primarily opinion-based by Brian Tompsett - 汤莱恩, Glorfindel, Chenmunka, Nathan Tuggy, Varun Nair Dec 28 '15 at 9:29

Many good questions generate some degree of opinion based on expert experience, but answers to this question will tend to be almost entirely based on opinions, rather than facts, references, or specific expertise. If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.

  • 3
    When I'd play billiards with my friends and hot chicks were shown, I'd always tell them: why are you staring at those? you'll never get them. – Alejandro Dec 27 '15 at 14:22
  • 1
    "Eight ball, side pocket". – Tᴚoɯɐuo Dec 27 '15 at 17:43
2

One that I've seen used rather often is:

Earth to J.R.!

It's meant figuratively. Since the person has "spaced out" from the distraction, his friends call to him as if he were an astronaut in space.

This idiom is listed in TFD as earth to someone. If you Google "Earth to _____", using a name in place of the blank, you can find some excerpts where this is used in fictional works, like these:

“Earth to Tony,” Dudley said, snapping his fingers in Tony's face. “I asked where you've been?”

“Earth to David! You can put your tongue back in your mouth!” Amber jealously remarked.

“Madison,” Savannah said. “Earth to Madison.”
“Sorry,” Madison replied. “My mind wandered.”

“Jan? Earth to Jan! Come in, please!”
“Oh! Sorry. I'm just sorting things out in my head. These have been very full days for me.”

1

This question is "wide open" in the sense that you could literally say thousands of things in this situation.

Your own sentence works about as well as anything else you could say. But it does not sound natural. And of course, everybody's definition of what is "humorous" differs. A few things I can think of, not wishing to be too mocking, include

first, the obvious:

Hey. Are you gonna play or watch TV?

Other possibilites

When you've finished watching TV, let me know so we can resume our game.

Call me when you're done watching TV; I'll be (at the bar, in the car, etc).

Hey, since you're watching TV I guess you won't mind if I skip your turn (or: if I go again).

Is your TV at home broken?

You're exactly the kind of chump they make these type of commercials for.

If I had known you needed a condom I wouldn't have used all mine last night with (your sister, your mother...)

Be careful about the last one. He'd have to be a pretty good buddy to use that one without eliciting a fight.

blah blah ad infinitum...

Not the answer you're looking for? Browse other questions tagged or ask your own question.