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Is this sentence correct?

We would have more to gain by stopping to approach people like that

If not, what about these:

We would have more to gain if we would stop approaching people like this

We would gain more if we don't approach people like that

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*We would have more to gain by stopping to approach people like that

Is not standard.

?We would have more to gain by stopping approaching people like that.

Would, I think, be grammatically unacceptable to most experts/experienced English users. At best it would be awkward to the native speaker's eye, if not ear. I would expect to hear this kind of construction in ordinary speech sometimes, but not to read it in print.

We would have more to gain if we would stop approaching people like this.

Is ok, but the following sounds more natural:

We would have more to gain if we stopped approaching people like this.

or

We would (we'd) have more to gain if we stop approaching people like this.

As a matter of style, I'd generally prefer to refine it to:

We will (we'll) gain more if we stop approaching people like this.

or

We would (we'd) gain more if we stop (or stopped) approaching people like this.

  • Thanks for your propositions! How would it sound using "would" for the last one: "we would gain more if we stop approaching people like this"? – JinSnow Jan 4 '16 at 6:15
  • Thanks for your edit! "Some of us have discussed this issue recently" sorry, I don't understand, what issue are you talking about? (Could you give a link?) – JinSnow Jan 4 '16 at 6:33
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    One of the issues is the verb form when we talk about something that is "unreal", for example, a possibility, an "if". This is mentioned here ell.stackexchange.com/questions/77554/…. – Jim Reynolds Jan 4 '16 at 7:27
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I'm afraid both your sentences are slightly incorrect. Try these :

"We would have more to gain by not approaching people like that"

and

"We would have more to gain if we stop approaching people like this"

  • Thanks! The last one sound weird, but I'm not a native. – JinSnow Jan 4 '16 at 6:00
  • don't remove it, you are definitely more native than me! Let's wait for some confirmations. – JinSnow Jan 4 '16 at 6:04
  • @JimReynolds, I'm sorry. That was an obvious mistake. Thanks for pointing it out. – Varun Nair Jan 4 '16 at 6:05
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    I would definitely use stopped not stop here. – Araucaria Jan 4 '16 at 14:22
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    I concur with @Araucaria: the irrealis would in the consequence clause calls for an irrealis past form in the condition clause. – StoneyB Jan 4 '16 at 14:25

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