I can obvious just say the internet is fast/slow, but I want some different expression when it is/becomes super-fast/slow . (something like the internet flies? Is there a proper way of saying that?)

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    Cranking up, Zooming around. – Thor Aug 22 '13 at 18:02
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    This may be slightly specialized, but I think referring to the presence or absence of “lag” (latency) is probably your best bet. The adjective “laggy” may also come in handy. Examples: “Wow, there's no lag right now!”, or “Our Internet (connection) is really laggy at the moment.” – Tyler James Young Aug 22 '13 at 21:03
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    If you're just looking be more emphatic, you can use adjectives before “fast” or “slow” to communicate that the speed is more extreme in either direction. Examples: “The Internet is blazing fast right now.”, “... brutally slow...”, or countless other emphatic adjectives or adverbs. – Tyler James Young Aug 22 '13 at 21:15
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    My internet is slower than a herd of snails traveling through peanut butter – user33910 May 10 '16 at 16:13

I don't believe there's a standard phrase to refer to fluctuations in internet speed (aside from the technical terminology used by internet service providers, but that doesn't seem to be what you're asking for).

As such, any word which conveys speed (or a lack thereof) could be used. I'm more familiar with such a word being an adjective though (rather than a verb, as you've used). Also, I usually hear references to one's own internet connection described as 'my internet' rather than 'the internet'.

For example:

My internet's crawling tonight.


My internet's flying!

However, people will often just use

My internet's being really slow/fast.

as you mentioned.


When Net is slow, I say it's dead.

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    I'm sure it's just differences of personal usage, but if I used 'dead', I'd be wanting to convey that it was down altogether. – Richard Williams Aug 22 '13 at 19:15

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