If someone is going to write something about the things between his father and himself, which title is more correct, "My father and I" or "My father and me"?
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What do you mean by the things between his father and himself? Can you give some examples? Either phrase can be used as a title. To me, it's mainly an issue of formality, with my father and me being less formal.– user6951Commented Mar 26, 2015 at 14:39
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Unless you have a preposition it is I. Unless you don't care about grammar. But neither one is a good title.– LambieCommented May 7, 2017 at 19:48
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5 Answers
When using that phrase as a title, both variations are valid. There is, however, a slight difference in meaning, I think.
For me, My father and I concentrates a bit more on the things you and your father experienced together, while My father and me emphasizes about your relationship.
These are felt meanings, though, so both may be used in any case.
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1I was thinking along the lines of "The relationship between my father and me" versus "The experiences my father and I share"– npstCommented Nov 27, 2013 at 11:11
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2What about "The relationship my father and I share" vs "The experiences between my father and me"? The correct way to phrase it hinges on the preposition (in this case, between).– J.R. ♦Commented Nov 27, 2013 at 14:24
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1While my answer seems to be a matter of opinion, it's the only one that does address the issue, which is using that phrase as a title. The other answers treat it as part of a sentence, which is a different topic.– npstCommented Nov 29, 2013 at 9:55
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I was one of the most vocal against this answer, but now I'll confess that somehow I overlooked that critical part about it being used as a title. I've taken the liberty to put the word title in bold, and I hope you'll accept my humble apologies for completely mischaracterizing your initial answer.– J.R. ♦Commented Nov 29, 2013 at 10:24
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@npst Very true indeed. Your answer addresses the use of the phrase as a title. I don't see this in any other answers. +1 Commented Dec 9, 2015 at 7:55
It depends which case you are talking about. Nevertheless, here are the simple rules.
These two are personal pronouns. A simple tip is use the pronoun I, along with other subjective pronouns when the pronoun is the subject of a verb:
Tim and I went to a restaurant.
Use the pronoun me, along with other objective pronouns when the pronoun is the object of a verb:
A suspicious man followed Julie and me to our house.
Use the pronoun me, along with other objective pronouns when the pronoun is the object of a preposition:
The manager spent the whole day with Mike and me to discuss business opportunities.
Me with Mike forms the object of the preposition with and hence the pronoun me fits better than I.
You may also probably see it this way: Remove the second person and check whether it fits to I or me. This having said, me went to a restaurant, A suspicious man followed I to our house, and The manager spent the whole day with I does not fit
answered Nov 27, 2013 at 7:19
A very simple answer:
If you are using as Subject, it will be: "My father and I",
and if you are using as an Object, it will be: "My father and me".
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Stating my father and I seems to suggest that you are more important than your father? How can this be correct?– user18429Commented Mar 26, 2015 at 3:35
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@Amy - "My father and I went to the store." Nothing in that sentence suggests either party is more important than the other. If anything, one might say that, by putting your father first, you are giving deference. Truth is, though, "...and I" sounds more natural that "I and...", so I would also say "My friend and I went to the store," or even, "My nemesis and I went to the store," not, "I and my nemesis went to the store."– J.R. ♦Commented Mar 26, 2015 at 9:05
If you have trouble recognizing which of the forms to use, determining whether it's object or subject, simply remove "My father".
I went to the cinema.
My father and I went to the cinema.
or
The guards stopped me at the border.
The guards stopped my father and me at the border.
It works the same, no matter if you're at the end of the list, in the middle of it, or without a list, just alone - and you should know how to handle that last case.
You will sometimes see people writing "My father and me went to the cinema.". That's common, but that's wrong - it's a very common error. Don't repeat it.
Who went to the cinema boy? My father and me! sounds OK, my father and I sounds wrong to me but then again I would use dad! If unprompted My father an I went to the cinema sounds good and father and me went to the cinema sounds not so good but if a time or day is added it is slightly improved father and me went to the cinema today but still harsh on the ear!
