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My friend (let's say he's named Joe) is telling me how he spent time at a birthday party. Two days later I want to talk about that to my other friend (let's say Ryan). What's the right way?

Joe told me how he spent time at a birthday party.

or

He told me how he had spent time at a birthday party.

I, personally, think that the second example is correct because birthday had been before he told me about it.

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  • They are both correct. It depends on what you want to say. If you want to say that his spending time at a birth party preceded his telling you, use the past perfect. If it does not matter, use simple past. past perfect always involves a prior event, actually stated or just implied.
    – Lambie
    Commented Nov 2, 2021 at 18:57

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Joe told me how he spent time at the birthday party.

If you are telling Ryan about this event and only this event then you use the simple past tense.

Joe told me how he had spent time at the birthday party, then at the beach, and how he finally made it home that morning.

If you are telling Ryan about all these events together then you need to use past perfect tense, since it a series of events that occurred in the past.

An useful blog post about when to use past-perfect tense

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    I think the distinction you have ascribed is a result of listing several events, not the tense. To me, the sentence makes just as much sense without “had.” Disagree.
    – gen-ℤ ready to perish
    Commented Oct 18, 2020 at 23:49
  • I did not understand your comment. What do you disagree with? Not using "had" or using "had". Your comment is contradictory.
    – Dhanishtha Ghosh
    Commented Oct 19, 2020 at 7:35

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