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I recently got divorced, and I'm having trouble getting used to calling the mother of my child my "ex-wife" or "ex-partner".

We're good friends and dedicated parents, and it feels weird to constantly emphasise the fact that we used to be married, but now aren't. Really, the nature of our relationship now is defined by friendship and co-parenting.

Is there another term that would be more suitable? I guess I can't call her "my co-parent" as that would vaguely imply she's my parent, right?

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  • There are so many ways of describing your ex-wife for this that this must be opinion-based. However, for what it's worth, I agree that 'ex/ex-wife' focuses on the now ended marriage relationship rather than the continuing parenting one. When I was in this situation, with people who knew us, I could just say e.g. 'I have A and B at weekends and Mary has them on weekdays'. For others, e.g. teachers, officials, employer, etc, I could say 'My ex-wife, Ms X, with whom I share custody', or simply 'A and B's mother'. You don't need to repeatedly explain things to people. Usually, once is enough.
    – Michael Harvey
    Commented Oct 13, 2022 at 19:32

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If it is not important for you to express that you and your daughter's mother were once married, refer to your ex as your daughter's mother.

Linda's mother and I are [both] raising Linda.

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