"I don't want to have to leave" what does it mean?

Question

I've been listening to Mutual by Shawn Mendes and one line of the lyrics gets me confused, especially the "have to" part

No I don't want to have to leave.
But half of you's not enough for me.

Do I want to stay nor not? Am I being asked to leave but I don't want to leave? Do I willingly want to leave?

full lyrics here

Answer 1

Thank you for posting the next line, because that is actually the explanation for the first line.

It means something like this:

1. If I can only have half of you, I will leave.
2. I would prefer to have all of you and stay.
3. You won't let me have more than half of you.
4. Combining (1) and (3), I will leave.

The original puts this all much more concisely and poetically.

Answer 2

It means they don't want to leave but if they have to leave then they will.