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"He who makes amends and does so without hesitation, his reputation will be grand, even among his enemies."

I don't understand where the comma splice is? "He who makes amends and does so without hesitation" is not independent. @stangdon @FumbleFingers

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    I'd vote for having a comma.
    – Maulik V
    Commented Mar 17, 2016 at 12:19
  • I'd keep the comma too !
    – Varun Nair
    Commented Mar 17, 2016 at 12:28
  • On a different note, wouldn't 'amoungst' be a better word instead of 'amoung' ?
    – Varun Nair
    Commented Mar 17, 2016 at 12:29
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    @VarunKN - I think you mean "amongst", not "amoungst".
    – stangdon
    Commented Mar 17, 2016 at 14:43
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    I would actually lose the comma, because the "even among his enemies" part isn't, in my opinion, actually a parenthetical or an aside as much as it is the real point of the saying. However, my bigger concern is that the sentence features a comma splice, because "his reputation will be grand" is an independent clause. It would be more grammatical and fluent to say "He who makes amends and does so without hesitation will have a grand reputation..."
    – stangdon
    Commented Mar 17, 2016 at 14:46

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The entire sentence isn't really an idiomatic construction anyway (it's an unusual syntax almost exclusively reserved for poetic / aphoristic "maxims, declarations"). Plus it would always look "strange" to most native speakers, because reputations are invariably great, not grand.

But the final comma is entirely a stylistic choice, as can be shown by the fact that it's perfectly okay to speak the line with/without a significant pause at that point (which is all the comma represents here).

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