Which of the following sentences should be used when we talk with the intention of being more respectful and/or asking permission for the sake of courtesy?
- "Should I wait or may I take leave now?"
- "Should I wait or may I leave now?"
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#1 is non-idiomatic except in a contrived context where to take leave means to take (or reserve) a period of absence from work (holiday). There's the archaic / formal construction to take one's leave (= to leave), but I'd advise avoiding that. Stick with #2.– FumbleFingersCommented May 3, 2018 at 12:41
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2 Answers
- is what you want to be correct and formal. Using "may" is more than enough to be respectful and courteous.
- is a different meaning than you think. I does not just mean to leave the office or house or wherever. "Take leave" means that you will be officially taking time off work, such as to have a baby.
- "Take one's leave" or "take my leave" of you etc. exist, but they are so old and formal that you would sound ridiculous. Your sentence in 1. does not give this meaning because the grammar is different. For this meaning, you need, "I will take my leave of you now," for example.
I'd suggest that neither of these are particularly common phrases anymore, and although people will understand what you mean - they are perhaps too formal.
The first phrase, with a slight modification becomes idiomatic - although dated. Note in google ngram search, that popularity of the phrase has been declining since the 1850s.
Should I wait, or may I take my leave?
This will be understood by almost anybody, but it sounds very old-fashioned and as such, will have an overly formal tone to it. You will absolutely not risk being rude with this phrase - although you may come across slightly unusual.
The second phrase, is grammatically correct as it is. However, (in British culture) it would be slightly more rude to ask directly about leaving.
That is, saying:
May I leave now?
Can sound a little too eager to get away. It's not distinctly rude, but it does suggest you aren't wanting to stay any longer than you have to/are not necessarily enjoying this person's company.
However, in British culture, unless with friends, it's more common to skirt around the idea of leaving - using phrases that suggest, but don't directly state you will leave.
For example:
(Family/Aquaintences) Would you like me to stay a bit longer? [Because if you don't I'm leaving]
(Work) Is there anything else for us to discuss? [Because I'm going back to my desk if we're done]
(Anywhere) Is that us [done] then? [If we are, we can move onto goodbyes]